Fruit fit for a king
by T.One
Summary: Hao had sent a mysterious package to Yoh. Ren is suspisious. Horo Horo is hungry. Chocolove is just Chocolove. What are they planning to do with the strange package? No pairings involve


T.One here. This is fic is mine but the characters are not. I'm from South East Asia myself and would just like to share some of my culture with the shaman crew...heheheh ;P as well as the readers. Hope you enjoy.  
  
Fruit fit for a King  
  
In the Asakura inn in Funbari, the shamans were anxious and feeling on the edge. That morning someone, or more well known as Asakura Hao, had sent a special delivery to the inn. That was enough for all the shamans, meaning Yoh and his friends, to be on high alert. Thankfully, Anna was not present as she had left for a shopping trip with Pilika, Tamao and Jun early that morning before the suspicious package arrived.  
  
"What IS that this?" asked Horo Horo using his finger to prod the funny looking item. It was a sphere that was greenish-yellow in colour that was covered in what looked like spikes. "Dunno" said Yoh "But Hao said in the letter he sent along with this thing, that it is a special fruit fit for a king" as he was reading from the letter.  
  
"I think it's a trick of some kind to kill us" came a gruffy voice standing a distance away from the spiky sphere. "Maybe it's a bomb in disguise!" Agreed Chocolove. "Baka!" Horo Horo said "He did mention that is was a fruit. So what are we waiting for...LET'S EAT!" Horo Horo went for the fruit trying to bite it, to the horror of the others who couldn't make it in time to stop him. But luckily, the fruit triumph against the ice shaman with its spiky outer layer.  
  
"Kisama!" yelled Ren "What were you thinking! You could've made it explode!" as he was beating the life out of Horo Horo. "Well at least it didn't OK! So quit your worrying!" Horo Horo yelled back despite his injuries. Then he turned to Yoh "So leader, what do you think we should do to this hell spawned fruit?" "Yeah, we couldn't just leave it there" Chocolove was now standing very far away since Horo Horo's failed attempt to eat the fruit, thinking it was a bomb.  
  
"Hmmm... If it is really a trick, I think we should at least try to defuse it before it hurts anyone" said Yoh "And how do you suggest we do that?" asked Ren looking slightly annoyed at the situation before him "You of course!" Yoh replied giving his aloof smile. There was a microsecond of awkward silence before Ren yelled bloody murder at Yoh "KISAMA!!!! You're trying to sacrifice me to that thing" He pointed his glaive at Yoh. "Why is it that you aren't the one defusing that thing!"  
  
"Ren, I can't. It's too dangerous"  
  
"Dangerous!! Then what about me!"  
  
"You have a glaive. It is long enough to destroy the thing without you getting too hurt"  
  
The rest of them nodded in agreement. While Ren just mumbled angrily about a conspiracy. That was when Manta came in to the inn after his cram school, just as Ren was getting ready to slice the thing with his glaive.  
  
"Yoh-kun..." He paused as he saw the spiky sphere "Yoh-kun....Do.. do...do you know what THAT is?" he spazed. "Manta! You know what that is?" The young shaman asked his chibi sized friend. "Yes, it's actually very famous. It's...." But he never got to finish his sentence when, Ren sliced the spiky fruit into a dozen pieces. The next thing that happened was a strange pungent odour filled the room. It was more, foul smelling than the time Horo Horo farted. All the shamans were out of the room in a split second.  
  
"What the HELL was that?" Chocolove said in disgust "Horo Horo was it you?" Yoh and Manta yelled together "Kisama! I knew I shouldn't have spared your life" threatened Ren holding his glaive in a dangerous position to attack Horo Horo. "IT WASN"T ME!" yelled Horo Horo "Ainu's honour. It was that accursed fruit your weird brother decided to kill us with" He pointed at Yoh.  
  
It was then the sound of the front door opening was heard. "Anna!" the all said at the same time. God knows what dangers might befall them if she found out that the inn was stink-bombed. In a flash Yoh was at the entrance trying to stall the girls from even entering the inn.  
  
"Yoh. What in the world are you trying to do?"  
  
"Anna. I think that today we might dine in style at the Tao's hotel. Ren said it will be his treat" Yoh lied through his teeth hoping that Ren wouldn't kill him and that Anna wouldn't find our about their little secret. But Anna being Anna, could detect anything fishy in a matter of seconds.  
  
"Yoh" her voice soft but dangerous "What is that smell?" "Smell? What smell?" Yoh hiccupped while using body language asking for backup from the others. "Yeah, what smell?" they chorus after him "The strange pungent smell coming from the living room" she pointed out, as her features bored a warning of a end worse than death to all the boys. "Yeah, I smell it too. Yuck, it's disgusting!" said Pilika pinching her nose with Tamao and Jun, following her lead.  
  
"Oh, that smell" Chocolove said nervously under the stare of the itako "Its...Its.." "Spit it out!" snapped the itako "It was Horo Horo!" he said pointing at the Ainu shaman. "No, it was not!" and before the others could stop him, he manage to blurt out "It was that weird fruit!"  
  
"Fruit?" Anna said and without a moment notice she went into the living room before anyone could stop her. The rest of them then followed her to the pungent room. There they saw her standing near one of the opened fruit. The thing that astounded them was that she wasn't even bothered with the smell and in addition to that, she was picking up what looked like a yellow soft sachet from one of the split pieces of the fruit. And then she ate it.  
  
"ANNA!!!" yelled the shamans in shock. Yoh instantly ran towards his fiancée trying to see if she was okay. "Anna. Are you insane? You ate that thing" Yoh cried shaking his fiancée by the shoulders. His anxiety was short lived by a shortly delivered slap to his face. "I'm fine. It's only a fruit" "Eh?" Chocolove said while pinching his nose "You mean that, that thing really is a fruit and not some kind of device of impending doom?" "Of course it's a fruit." Manta said also holding his nose "I was trying to explain it earlier on. It is called a Durian, mostly grown in South East Asia. It is renowned for it's pungent smell which earned it the title as the King of Fruits" "Why didn't you say so earlier" Horo Horo asked the small sized teen "I had to run out because of the smell" he replied.  
  
"That means all our worrying was all in vain" said Ren "Not really, the fruit was evil smelling enough" Manta said "So what are we going to do about it?" he looked to Yoh "Umm... There's nothing we can do but either eat it or dump it" but he thought to himself 'Leave it to Hao to do something so devious' He looked to those present for a vote. It was unanimous vote, only made by one person and one person only. "Eat" said the itako "I don't believe in wasting food" and the durian party began, even if most of them couldn't stand the taste and/or the smell.  
  
Meanwhile in a far, far away place Hao sat down near the fire munching happily on a small piece of yellow, pungent fruit. "Opacho, would you like some?" he asked cheerfully handing some to the shaman "Ah...Opacho is not hungry Hao-sama" he/she hurriedly said and left to join the other Hao's followers who were confused as to why their leader is strangely attracted to that weird fruit.  
  
END  
  
So? How was it? I am not really sure if the Durian is really the King of Fruits, but I'm pretty much certain that it is not something that many people enjoy outside of SE Asia, Maybe it's because of the smell of the fruit. It is really strong. For those who had encountered this fruit will have known what I mean. Anyway this is meant to be a parody and for those who don't like it, you're welcome to flame me...but if you do like it, REVIEW!! 


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